I know you can’t choose your sexual orientation but homosexuality would be hella convenient for me
Matthew took me to this art shop to show me paintings by his favourite artist and I asked him why he liked that artist and he said stuff about liking the colours but then he also said “and he always paints such beautiful people” and I thought that was a worryingly shallow thing to say but hey ho maybe he meant beautiful in a deep and meaningful way who knowz
Last night I woke up and ran out of my bedroom screaming because I believed there were spiders and snakes in my bed
Without wishing to sound like a conspiracy theorist, if I had to invent a way to undermine feminism as a socially useful movement, here’s what I’d do. I’d set up a ridiculous standard for personal and professional attainment, one that would be unachievable for the vast majority of women who weren’t independently wealthy, white and upper-middle class and I’d call it “having it all”. After I’d set up this impossible standard, I’d be sure to make women feel like failures for not attaining it.
Last night this really attractive woman bought me a drink and oh I just don’t know any more